Nobu, Hong Kong

One day when the pollution cleans up, NOBU InterContinental Hong Kong would be able to lay claim to a stunning harbour view. One day… Not quite tomorrow or next week but one day eventually.

Carbon-copy press releases declared, "NOBU at InterContinental Hong Kong showcases innovative Japanese cuisine." On my bitchy days, I hate it when the word "innovative" is used to describe food. There's nothing vaguely aesthetic or emotional about the word 'innovative'. Furthermore, there is this nuance of functionality attached to the word. What do you do with food? You just eat it! You could play with it but your mum would never approve. What's 'innovative'? Science is innovative and so is technology and design! The newest Nokia clamshell-touchpad-too-many functions-too-handle phone and Herman Millar chairs are innovative. But “innovative food”?

Ok fine you want to be innovative? Surprise me.



We ordered the Nobu Signature Bento Box and Nobu Hong Kong Bento Box, which seemed pretty comprehensive for Nobu virgins.



If there was anything worth mentioning, it would have to be the salad dressings and sauces. The yellowtail tempura roll, black cod saikyo yaki, sashimi salad with Matsuhisa dressing and rock shrimp tempura with creamy spicy sauce were gloriously coated with pick-me-up dressings. For that matter, I could do very well with a daily serving of the rock shrimp tempura with Nobu’s patented-oo-oo sauce.

Sadly, the saucy affair begins and ends there.



The sushi assortment was so-so and the sashimi assortment trio threaded on the pass-fail border by being tasteless and limp.



What really threw the restaurant off course was its blatant lack attention paid to commonplace Japanese dishes- the oyako don and pork katsu. As both are such quintessential dishes, one would have been shocked by how mediocre both dishes were.

The oyako don was suffered from chicken deficit and the pork katsu was nothing more than a piece of pork loin, bread crumbed and deep fried till the juiciness have been unceremoniously zapped out.

The sea urchin spine-filled ceiling which evoked 'hmms' and 'ohhhs' initially soon took on a more sinistic shape. Halfway through lunch, I was half-hoping the sea urchin spines would miraculously dislodge themselves and shower upon us, so that we could leave without having to pay for lunch.



To commemorate the truffle season, Nobu prepared a special truffle menu and we decided to indulge a little with the soba risotto with truffle. Grainier and coarser, the buckwheat risotto had character of its own- in fact, it had too much character and refused to mingle with the truffle flavor. Till this date, both parties still remain aloof from each other



The fancysmazzy-sounding chocolate bento box turned out to be nothing more than a molten chocolate cake served in a commonplace bento box. There was nothing special about the bento box, devoid of flavour or aesthetic enhancing significance whatsoever; in fact, it wouldn’t have made a difference if the cake had been served on Royal Copenhagen china or a paper box. Served with a deliciously bitter green tea ice cream, the hot-cold contrast was sorely missed as the molten chocolate within was barely lukewarm.



The matcha teacake inspired the only ‘You got to try this’ comment of the day. In contrast to the heavy ice cream and chocolate cake, the teacake and sorbet provided sweet relief to those looking for something light.

Nobu first wowed critics and won aficionados in 1994 with “innovative Japanese cuisine”. However it pays to note that what was innovative in 1994 now screams ‘tired and blah’. It’s like “the Rachel”. The who? The Rachel hairdo. Back in the late 1990s, people rushed to hair salons clutching pictures of Jennifer Aniston’s character Rachel Greene, demanding the Rachel do’; yet more than a decade on, the Rachel ‘do’ is really a Rachel ‘don't’.

There was something troubling about the lunch crowd too- a mainland Chinese couple, 2 expatriates, a couple of business folks and us (tourists). The lack of boisterous locals was unsetting and made me wonder if death was on the cards. Apparently, Mr Matsuhisa spends most of his time “traveling to his restaurants and looking out for prospective sites for new locations.” One thinks it’s time he paid a visit to Hong Kong.



"No Boo"...